Henry was an
Unlucky man
Who found
disaster
Like no one can.
He could sit
quite still
And barely
breathe,
But yet bad luck
Would him
bequeath
The worst of
fates
That any man
Had ever known
Since time
began.
First of all he
Lost an eye
By simply eating
Apple pie.
A bit of crust
Went up his
nose,
From whence a
heated
Sneeze arose.
He sneezed so
hard
His eye popped
free;
The cat walked
by,
The eye was tea.
Secondly he
Lost an ear
By simply
drinking
Ginger beer.
He took a swig,
Began to cough,
He choked so
hard,
His ear fell
off.
He searched for
it
Upon one knee;
The dog walked
by,
The ear was tea.
Then he lost
A single arm
By simply going
To the farm.
He walked inside
The old wood
store,
An axe fell
down;
No arm no more.
He tried to grab
The limb and
flee;
A pig walked by,
The arm was tea.
As time went by
Henry found
That bits of him
Fell to the
ground.
A leg chopped
here,
A finger there,
Eventually,
He had no hair.
Animals would
Follow him,
Growing plump
On his dead
skin.
No matter where
Poor Henry went,
He would have
An accident.
So he resolved
To stay indoors
Wrapped in
Woollen under
draws.
No mishap
Could him befall
Without a move
From him at all.
So there he sat
For fifty years,
With just one
eye
And a single
ear.
Until one day
Old Henry died,
Of ripe old age
At ninety-five.
They buried him
Far out at sea,
Where the fishes
ate
